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Moses and God are watching people on earth one day and Moses points out to God that a Rabbi is playing golf on the Sabbath. God says, "what do you want me to do about it?" Moses says "I don't know, but he shouldn't be able to get away with that." God says ok. So just as the Rabbi tees off, God sends a bolt of lightning that hits the ball in the air and the ball shoots like a bullet to a tree, bounces off of it and hits another tree, shoots up to the green, circles the hole twice and falls in the hole. A hole in one. Moses is furious. He says "you call that punishment!?!?!" And God says "Who is he going to tell?"
 

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Obsessive compulsive golfer finally meets the perfect woman. After a whirlwind romance they marry and go on a golf honeymoon. About halfway through the scenic country course he makes a bad shot (honeymoon nerves) and the ball lies behind a barn from the green. His bride suggest that if they open the barn doors on both ends he can hit it right through the middle, but when he tries it the ball hits something in the barn and bounces straight back striking her in the head - killing her instantly.

He grieves, time passes, and he meets another wonderful lady - and they go on the same honeymoon where he hits the same shot and ends up behind the same barn. This bride suggests the same thing - open the doors and go through the barn. To which he replies "No way. Last time I tried that I got a double bogey."
 

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A guy is golfing with a business associate and they see a funeral procession coming up the road with all the headlights on. The man stops and takes off his hat and holds it over his heart as they pass. He puts it back on and prepares to hit the ball and his associate says "That kind of surprised me. You didn't seem like the type to think about a funeral procession." The guy says "well I was married to her for 30 years..."
 
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