Dog For Sale
A guy was driving around the back woods of Montana, when he saw a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: Talking Dog For Sale. He stopped his car, went up to the front door, rang the doorbell, and the owner appeared and told him that the dog was out in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Yellow Labrador Retriever sitting there. "Can you actually talk?" he asked. "Yep," the Lab replied.
After the guy recovered from his initial shock of hearing that a dog could actually talk, he asked, "So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and said, "Well, when I was pretty young, I discovered that I could talk, so I wanted to help the government as a CIA spy.
"In no time at all the CIA had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.
"I was one of their most valuable spies for eight-years running.
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger, so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals."
"I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asked the owner how much he wanted for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy replied.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a compulsive liar. He has never once been out of our backyard!"