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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    1,705

    Default How to deal with telemarketers

    1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. Ask, "How long can I keep it? Do I have to ever pay it back, or is it like the other money I borrowed before my bankruptcy?"

    2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "Why do you want to know?" Or you can say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one seems
    to care these days and I have all these problems, my sciatica is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died . . ." When they try to get back to the sales process, just continue on with telling about your problems.

    3. If the person says he's Joe Doe from the XYZ Company, ask him to spell his name, then ask him to spell the company name, then ask where it is located. Continue asking personal questions or questions about the company for as long as necessary.

    4. Crying out, in well-simulated tones of pleasure and surprise, "Judy!! Is this really you? I can't believe it! Judy, how have you
    BEEN?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

    5. Say, "No," over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each no, and keep an even tempo even as they're trying to speak. This is the most fun if you can keep going until they hang up.

    6. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up with their Family and Friends plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can muster, "I don't have any friends . . . would you be my friend?"

    7. If they clean rugs: "Can you get blood out, you can? Well, how about goat blood or human blood - chicken blood too?"

    8. Let the person go through their spiel, providing minimal but necessary feedback in the form of an occasional "Uh-huh, really, or, "That's fascinating." Finally, when they ask you to buy, ask them for their name, birth date, and SS#. They get all flustered, but just tell them you couldn't give your credit card number to someone who's a complete stranger.

    9. Tell them you work for the same company they work for.
    Example: Telemarketer: "This is Bill from Watertronics."
    You: "Watertronics!! Hey I work for them too. Where are you calling from?"
    Telemarketer: "Uh, Dallas, Texas." You: "Great, they have a group there too? How's business/the weather? Too bad the company has a policy against selling to employees! Oh well, see ya."

    10. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy and if they will give you their phone number you will call them back. If they say they are not allowed to give out their number, then ask them for their home number and tell them you will call them at home (this is usually the most effective method of getting rid of Telemarketers). If the person says, "Well, I don't really want to get a call at home," say, "Yeah! Now you know how I feel." (smiling, of course...)


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    lafargeville ny usa
    Posts
    254

    Default Re: How to deal with telemarketers

    respond to the tellemarketer i need some information, keep saying this sounds ok but i have a couple of questions. use a fake name and address. tell them you can not remember your zip code have them hold while you look for your spouse ,she knows about zip codes. ask to speak to a supervissor tell him the agent seems confused get assurance that you are dealing with " one of our best agents who will take the time needed to get this straihtened out". go thru it again.[ the trick here is to give them the exact same garbage information over and over a gain].about this point good news the mail lady is comeing up the road maybe she knows the zip code i'll write it down when i get a pencil. i could not find a pen or pencil so i used a crayon. now the fun starts because the zip code is for washington state the addreess is in wisconsin and the caller i.d. says new york state. keep in mind that the supervisor said take all the time you need. be sure you keep it going until they get to what is your credit card or social securiy number, they can check those fast. a few times put the caller on hold because of another call comeing in, but only after the supervisor talk', while on hold i ran the drill press makeing hive parts, drilling screw pilots in supers a normally boreing task, but not that day. one time on hold was 17 minutes for zip: code /mail lady.....true story.. 53 minutes one of my best. the tellemarketeers shift may ended..
    Last edited by mathesonequip; 12-26-2012 at 06:06 PM. Reason: spelling

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Herrick, SD USA
    Posts
    4,044

    Default Re: How to deal with telemarketers

    Tell them that you need to forward your call to the person responsible for making that decision and if you have a small child in the house just hand the phone to them. 2 to 3 years old is about the perfect age.
    "People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."- Andy Rooney

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    1,705

    Default Re: How to deal with telemarketers

    Well done, MathesonEquip! I just had to laugh.

    Have you ever done that before, Jim? What was the resulting consequence?

    Thanks guys!

  5. #5

    Default Re: How to deal with telemarketers

    Funny!!!

    When they are really chatty and I can't get a word in to mess with them, I just set the phone down and come back later to find them gone. Wonder how long they kept talking??? LOL

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    lafargeville ny usa
    Posts
    254

    Default Re: How to deal with telemarketers

    it occured to me this afternoon that i was makeing "wabbit holes" while i was entertaining the telemarketer.

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