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  1. #101
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Cartersville, Gerogia, USA
    Posts
    46

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    If your beeyard is 20 miles out, you left you hive tool at home and you find a screw driver to get by for the day….

    If you try to start your smoker with the truck cigarette lighter ‘cause your Bic lighter got wet…..

    If people in the restaurant move away from you ‘cause you’ve been taking off honey with Bee Go…..

    If the bees on you are stiff from the cold weather, then warming up in Home Depot they start buzzing around….

  2. #102
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Roy, Wa
    Posts
    1,575

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    [QUOTE=Makin' Honey;875969]If your beeyard is 20 miles out, you left you hive tool at home and you find a screw driver to get by for the day….


    A little girl was asked to get a screwdriver. She came back with a screwdriver and a butter knife. Then she asked 'do you want a daddy screwdriver or a mommy screwdriiver"

    Your post reminded me of that story

  3. #103
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Brasher Falls, NY, USA
    Posts
    26,228

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    I thought maybe the Mommy screwdriver was going to have alcohol in it.
    Mark Berninghausen "That which works, persists."

  4. #104
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Roy, Wa
    Posts
    1,575

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    LOL, good modification to the story.

  5. #105

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    You just might be a beekeeper if you drive to your day job and park your flatbed Dodge truck (complete with a hive tool on the dash and supers tied on the back with the unmistakable "bee knot") next to all the cars in the parking lot.

  6. #106
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Central CA.
    Posts
    467

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."


  7. #107
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Brasher Falls, NY, USA
    Posts
    26,228

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Lordy, Allen Dick? Must have been his last Post. Thanks Jim.
    Mark Berninghausen "That which works, persists."

  8. #108
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Roy, Wa
    Posts
    1,575

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    If you are getting ready for holiday baking and are grocery shopping. You walk by the baking dept and see powdered sugar. It dawns on you you need to grab a bag, because you used the last one to sprinkle on the hives...you might be a beekeeper

  9. #109
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    1,693

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    If...

    The windshield of your vehicle has at least two yellow dots on it.

    You have answers ready for questions about Africanized bees and the value of local honey in preventing allergies.

    Year eagerly await the phone call from the post office asking you to please come pick up your bees.

    You check out all the honey labels and prices at the supermarket.

    You've gone through the supermarket checkout line buying nothing more than a big load of sugar, and maybe some Crisco.

    You've estimated just how much money you spent to control mites.

    You pick up matches at restaurants, even though you don't smoke.

    Your friends and neighbors think you are the answer to every swarm and bees-in-the-wall problem.

    You are keenly aware of the first and last freezes of each winter.

    There is propolis on the steering wheel of your vehicle and the bottom of your boots.

    There is a bucket of something in your garage that can only be good for smoker fuel.

    You are called "the Bee Man," or "the Bee Lady" by a lot of people who don't know your name.

    You know the bloom period of more local flowers than the state horticulturist.

    You welcome a rainy weekend if it will stimulate nectar production.

    You don't mind driving home with a few honey bees inside your vehicle.

    Your family and friends know exactly what they're going to get for Christmas.

    You don't mow the lawn because the bees are working the weeds.

    You drive down a road and find yourself evaluating the roadside flowers for their honey-producing potential.

    You pull over and check the bees on the wildflowers just to see if they are YOUR bees, AND -- you can tell the difference.

    You come home smelling like a camp fire, and you haven't been camping.

    You saw Ulee's Gold and didn't think there were enough shots of the bees.

    You overhear your 9 year old daughter explaining to her friends how to tie a trucker's hitch.

    The school principal calls to ask that you never again let your child take a drone tied with a thread to school for show and tell.

    You never stop marveling at these wonderful creatures.

    *****

    You know you are married to a beekeeper if...

    You spend at least one day a week on your hands and knees with a sharp knife scraping wax and propolis off your kitchen floor.

    You've ever used bee boxes as furniture in your house, for coffee tables, chairs, night stands, and storage boxes.

    You mow around mountains of bee equipment that never seems to make it to the barn.

    You plan weddings, child birth, surgery and funerals around honey extracting time.

    When buying a new truck, your spouse checks weight loads and measures the bed to see how many hives he can fit in it.

    You get stung by the bee that was clinging to your husband's bee suit when you picked it up to wash it.

    **********

    Disclaimer: Not all of these apply to me. Some are for the ladies.
    Last edited by westernbeekeeper; 12-20-2012 at 09:48 AM.

  10. #110
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Roy, Wa
    Posts
    1,575

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    You've gone through the supermarket checkout line buying nothing more than a big load of sugar, and maybe some Crisco.

    I tell them with a straight face, I am on the Hollywood sugar diet..then enjoy the deer in the headlight's look they give me

  11. #111
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Herrick, SD USA
    Posts
    4,245

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    When I get the "that sure is a lot of sugar" comment. I just say "yup"
    "People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."- Andy Rooney

  12. #112
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Athens, OH
    Posts
    2,647

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    "I'm gonna try my hand at baking cookies"
    Politics is the entertainment branch of industry. -Frank Zappa

  13. #113
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    columbus,ohio,USA
    Posts
    518

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Just remembered this one from a few months ago.


    if...

    you worry about your parents being mad at you not becuase of bad grades, but the $200 truck tire you just shredded coming out of a bee yard.

    your parents are happy the worst trouble you get in, is destroying a tire, coming out of a bee yard.

    you dont get any homework done becuase the planned study time was taken up by changing out the flat you got coming out of a beeyard.
    Chris Cree
    Cree's Bees

  14. #114
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    St. Louis, Missouri, USA
    Posts
    626

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    You are in bed trying to fall asleep with a windstorm for backgound noise and all of a sudden it occurs to you that your hives may have been affected and you get up to make sure the bees are okay ...knocking your shin in the process.

  15. #115
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Worcester County, Massachusetts
    Posts
    3,543

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    ...if you've ever been pulled over because the police officer saw a bunch of bugs on the rear window of your station wagon, and thought there might be a dead body in the back....you might just bee a beekeeper.

    deknow
    The irony is free. It's the sarcasm you are paying for....ironically.
    -Felicity Jones in "Chalet Girl"

  16. #116
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    1,693

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Quote Originally Posted by deknow View Post
    ...if you've ever been pulled over because the police officer saw a bunch of bugs on the rear window of your station wagon, and thought there might be a dead body in the back....you might just bee a beekeeper.

    deknow
    Has it ever happened to you?

  17. #117
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Worcester County, Massachusetts
    Posts
    3,543

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Yes...but I had a good line for him. "These bees are headed to the Intercontinental Hotel."
    The irony is free. It's the sarcasm you are paying for....ironically.
    -Felicity Jones in "Chalet Girl"

  18. #118
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Rader, Greene County, Tennessee, USA
    Posts
    5,702

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Fancy hotels have discovered that bees are an additional way to separate guests from more of their money ...
    http://www.fbconfitdential.com/2011/...nental-boston/

    Graham
    --- Victor Hugo - "Common sense is in spite of, not the result of, education.

  19. #119
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Worcester County, Massachusetts
    Posts
    3,543

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    ???? I haven't seen anything at the hotel that has an additional charge because there are bees.....a fancy drink at a fancy hotel bar?

    We were not involved when that article was written.

    With that said, the hotel is also providing space for both beginning and advanced bee school (9 sessions total)...none of the students are hotel guests.

    deknow
    The irony is free. It's the sarcasm you are paying for....ironically.
    -Felicity Jones in "Chalet Girl"

  20. #120
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    St. Albans, Vermont
    Posts
    5,256

    Default Re: "You just might be a beekeeper."

    Quote Originally Posted by westernbeekeeper View Post
    Has it ever happened to you?
    Well, there was the time I drove out of the woods from the Castine yard. Cop was at the corner. Just knew he was gonna...

    Wanted to know if I was Chester the Molester. Seems a woman was attacked near there and the perp "Came out of the woods".

    "Nope, and I don't know anyone named Chester".

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