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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    columbus,ohio,USA
    Posts
    525

    Smile I owe my mother.....

    > 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
    > "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
    >
    > 2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
    > "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
    >
    > 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
    > "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
    >
    > 4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
    > " Because I said so, that's why."
    >
    > 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
    > "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
    >
    > 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
    > "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
    >
    > 7. My mother taught me IRONY.
    > "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to really cry about."
    >
    > 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
    > "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
    >
    > 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
    > "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
    >
    > 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
    > "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
    >
    > 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
    > "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
    >
    > 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
    > "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
    >
    > 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
    > "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
    >
    > 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
    > "Stop acting like your father!"
    >
    > 15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
    > "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
    >
    > 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
    > "Just wait until we get home."
    >
    > 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
    > "You are going to get it when you get home!"
    >
    > 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
    > "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
    >
    > 19. My mother taught me ESP.
    > "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
    >
    > 20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
    > "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
    >
    > 21.. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
    > "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
    >
    > 22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
    > "You're just like your father."
    >
    > 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
    > "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
    >
    > 24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
    > "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
    >
    > And my favorite:
    > 25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
    "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

    Chris Cree
    Cree's Bees

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Athens, Ohio, USA
    Posts
    42

    Big Grin Re: I owe my mohter.....

    That was great!! Now let me peel myself off the floor...
    --
    Take everything I say with a grain of sand.

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