20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

[Hambone]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it 'In'.

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Sexual Favors' ..

7. Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because

You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling
'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.' (one of my favorites!)& lt; /SPAN>

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity ..

[berkshire bee]

We DO need more cowbell.

[Hambone]

We DO need more cowbell.

lol!!

Ask and you shall recieve. It's a video for you dial uppers.

Cowbell

[BULLSEYE BILL]

It was you Derek! I thought you were asking for a cowbell smilie.

[Oldbee]

19) "Tell Your Children Over Dinner,..""Due to the Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go"". (one of my favorites!) --Derek.

Maybe you should have a room in the,. 'asylum'. Sorry, no windows,..plenty of 'bars' though.

[Hambone]

It was you Derek! I thought you were asking for a cowbell smilie.

I don't remember asking for one. But I would take it. I love me some cowbell! We did get the

[dragonfly]

I got a great chuckle out of those- especially the "for sexual favors" and "in accordance with the prophecy" ones.

[summer1052]

From a supernatural thriller/romance I read recently:

"When the insane starts arranging itself in recognizable patterns around you, you know you've got problems." -- KMM


Sum

[phil c]

I like to shop for other people. Just pick up a few small random items in your local grocery/big box/wal mart, and drop them into random peoples carts. Sit back and watch them check out if you can, otherwise imagine the reaction when they get home and find the sardine paste or microwave pork rinds.

Cheers, Phil

[Oldbee]

I like to shop for other people. Just pick up a few small random items in your local grocery/big box/wal mart, and drop them into random peoples carts. Sit back and watch them check out if you can, otherwise imagine the reaction when they get home and find the sardine paste or microwave pork rinds.

Cheers, Phil

No wonder ya gotta be,.. "Hawkeyes" in Iowa. Watch that,..'Phil'!

Good thing I don't go shopping much in Iowa!