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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    parker county, tx
    Posts
    7,923

    Default An oldie but goodie

    A new element has been discovered

    Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.
    The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron,
    25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons,
    giving it an atomic mass of 312.
    These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons,
    which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
    Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.
    However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
    A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second,
    to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years.
    It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons
    and deputy neutrons exchange places.
    In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,
    since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
    This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe
    that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.
    This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
    When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad),
    an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium,
    since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons
    So many weeds.......so little time.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Dane County, WI.
    Posts
    3,721

    Default

    Cute!
    Isodopes!?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Loganville, GA
    Posts
    2,172

    Default

    Not seen that one in a while DF, but it certainly does stand the test of time!!
    "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts." Winston Churchill

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    parker county, tx
    Posts
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Bizzybee View Post
    Not seen that one in a while DF, but it certainly does stand the test of time!!
    Yeah. Some things never change.
    So many weeds.......so little time.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Tulare County, CA USA
    Posts
    1,380

    Default

    Thanks Dragonfly,
    That's the first time I've laughed out loud in weeks... And this time it wasn't even at someone else's expense!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Hillsboro, Wisconsin, USA
    Posts
    1,672

    Default

    Appropriate timing, as Governmentium reached a critical morass earlier this week.

    MM

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Lavaca county, Texas
    Posts
    497

    Default



    It would be funny if it weren't true.


    Summer

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    parker county, tx
    Posts
    7,923

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by summer1052 View Post


    It would be funny if it weren't true.


    Summer
    Well, you know they say all humor has at least a grain of truth.
    So many weeds.......so little time.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    hamburg, new york, usa
    Posts
    440

    Default

    Dragonfly this is one of the funniest jokes i have read in a long time. Thanks

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    parker county, tx
    Posts
    7,923

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by pcelar View Post
    Dragonfly this is one of the funniest jokes i have read in a long time. Thanks
    You're welcome.
    So many weeds.......so little time.

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