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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    The Scenic Flint Hills , KS
    Posts
    5,159

    Default Praise the Lord!

    Praise the Lord!

    There was a little old lady that lived next door to RiverRat, who every morning stepped onto her front porch, raised her arms to the sky, and shouted: 'PRAISE THE LORD!'

    One day ole RiverRat became irritated at the little old lady.
    Every morning he'd step onto his front porch after her and yell: 'THERE IS
    NO LORD!'

    Time passed with the two of them carrying on this way every day.

    One morning, in the middle of winter, the little old lady stepped onto her
    front porch and shouted: 'PRAISE THE LORD! Please Lord, I have no food and I am starving, provide for me, oh Lord!

    The next morning she stepped out onto her porch and there were two huge bags of groceries sitting there.

    'PRAISE THE LORD!' she cried out. 'HE HAS PROVIDED GROCERIES FOR ME!'

    Just then RiverRat jumped out of the hedges and shouted:
    'THERE IS NO LORD; I BOUGHT THOSE GROCERIES!!'

    The little old lady threw her arms into the air and shouted: 'PRAISE THE
    LORD! HE HAS PROVIDED ME WITH GROCERIES AND MADE THE DEVIL PAY FOR THEM!'
    Bullseye Bill in The Scenic Flint Hills , KS
    www.myspace.com/dukewilliam

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Jenison, MI
    Posts
    1,514

    Default

    Ah yes, and to trace it back to the beginnings;

    When Riverrat was little, he was sitting in church with his mom.

    'Dear Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face, 'Without you, we are but dust...'

    He would have continued but at that moment little Riverrat who was listening leaned over to to his mother and asked quite audibly in his shrill little four year old voice, 'Mom, what is butt dust?'

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    The Scenic Flint Hills , KS
    Posts
    5,159

    Default

    I know Rats got religion, he sent me these here Ten Commandments;

    1) Just one God

    2) Put nothin' before God

    3) Watch yer mouth

    4) Git yourself to Sunday meetin'

    5) Honor yer Ma & Pa

    (6) No killin'

    7) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal

    8) Don't take what ain't yers

    9) No tellin' tales or gossipin'

    10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff
    Bullseye Bill in The Scenic Flint Hills , KS
    www.myspace.com/dukewilliam

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Oxford, Kansas
    Posts
    1,988

    Default

    Praise the lord . I feel loved her on the source. Can I have an AMEN

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    1,705

    Default Re: Praise the Lord!

    Sorry so late, but AMEN!

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