>>5. How exactly do you kill the old queen - sort of thank her, then squish her?<<
I hate killing my old queens. It seems a thankless task...but I just tell myself it is in the best interest of the colony. Yes...I usually just catch the old queen and say "thanks" for everything...and then do the deed of smushing her. I don't like to do it...but I do. I used to smush her on the new queen cage to impart some of her odor but I quit doing that a number of years ago and have found that it hasn't made much difference in acceptance.
"My child, eat honey, for it is good." (Proverbs 24:13)