Kids Playing Outside????

[NeilV]

The last post on the thread I started about TV got me to thinkin.

I live in a neighborhood that's just got to have some kids in it somewhere. But other than my own (age 2 and 5) I hardly ever see any. I grew up in a somewhat rough neighborhood, and we ran the neighborhood. My Mom used to basically throw me out of the house.

Are they all playing video games or what? What's the deal?? Is this the situation where you live?

[Mike Gillmore]

In our neighborhood we see the same thing happening. There are children living all around but they are seldom visible from the street. This is what I consider a very safe area but most parents, including our household, are keeping their children in a much more contained and controlled environment.

I was pretty much on my own as a youngster too and as long as I was home by 6pm for dinner all was well. I think that most of the parents in our circles are adjusting in order to protect their kids from the unseen kook lurking around the corner who may snatch up their child. Abductions are practically a daily segment in our news today and no one wants to be the next victim. It can be shocking when you get on line and look up the locations of all the sexual predators living in your area.

We tend to see friends gathering at one home or another either indoors or in back yards with constant supervision. It's a shame it has to be this way but that, unfortunately, is the world we live in.

[Natalie]

My kids play outside any chance they get.
I live on a busy street and most of us have fenced in yards for the children so while they may be out playing you usually do not see them.
If I can't take them for a supervised bike ride they ride their bikes all over the backyard.
Depending on where you live and the ages of the neighborhood children they could be in their backyards or they could be at after school and weekend sports. Dance class, gymnastics etc.
Sports take up alot of time and keep the kids away from the home.
Its not like when we were kids and just went out and played all day until the street lights came on.
While we had sports we usually did not have 3 or 4 going on at a time and most of our sports were pickup games.
Many children have jam packed schedules and very little free time, some parents feel that children need to have every minute of their life micromanaged and filled with activities that will "enrich" their lives.

[cow pollinater]

I bought the home accross the street from my parents home. It is a rural area and we live on a dead-end road. My kids don't know the differance between neighbors and family and sometimes the line is blurry for me as well. My wife took the kids to visit my sister and on the third day I had two different people stop and ask if everything was okay as they were concerned about not seeing the kids in the yard.
My neighbors send thier grandkids out to play with my kids in the same irrigation ditch that their son and I used to terrorize.
I suppose it probably helps that I tossed all of our TV's in the dumpster last year... Playing outside is the highpoint of the day for the entire family.

[crazytranes]

I think it is dependent upon how safe people feel in their neighborhood.

I live on an island about 2 miles out from Portland, ME (no bridges). It is a very safe neighborhood, most people do not lock their doors. In fact, when we moved in, our door did not have a lock on it! We asked our landlord to install one, then stopped using it when we realized that it was not needed. We have not locked our door for 3 years.

I always see a lot of kids out running around and playing. The neighborhood is very safe, especially since everyone knows everyone's kids. During the summer I will hear kids playing in the yard behind my house until 10 or 11pm! Part of me wants to ask them to keep it down, part of me is glad that they are playing outside instead of watching TV or playing video games!!

Only problem with the neighborhood is that there is very little for teens to do, so drinking and drugs are a big problem with a lot of the older kids.

[Natalie]

Its hard for teens if they can't occupy themselves in an appropriate way.
As my oldest children grew I wanted them to be able to hang out at the house and have friends over here.
I built a firepit and bought some adirondack chairs and another picnic table, bought a volleyball net and a radio.
Its amazing how much teenagers love to sit around a campfire listening to music, roasting marshmallows, playing the guitar and just being goofy.
The other parents were happy to know where their children were and that they were safe.
I also let them have friends over to watch movies or whatever else when the weather was bad or too cold to be outside.
They are comfortable about having friends over and know that I won't embarrass them so I am able to keep an eye on them.

[crazytranes]

My parents always had an open door policy to my and my siblings' friends. They followed your same reasoning, Natalie.

My brother is 7 yrs older than me (I'm the youngest of 4). His and my oldest sister's friends were over our house ALL THE TIME! It was a very rare night that there were only 6 around the dinner table. The net result is that I have lots and lots of surrogate brothers and sisters that our whole family keeps in contact with.

Once I was a teen, another family in our church opened up their house to us (fire in the fire pit every friday and saturday night :D), so I and my peer group was mostly over at their house on weekends. But, my parents still knew where I was and what I was doing.

When our kids reach that age, my wife and I also will open our house to their friends. If they have a safe place to hang out and be themselves, hopefully they will stay out of real trouble (drugs, the law, etc.) and only get in "good" trouble (missing curfew, boy/girl relationships, etc)

[Natalie]

Isn't it great to have all those memories of growing up and having kids in and out of the house and being made to feel welcome at other kid's houses?
My oldest is 21 now and he has a friend that comes over and visits our family even when my son isn't here.
He shows up and hangs out, eats dinner with us and watches football or whatever with my husband.
He has brought his girlfriend over to meet us and we had them over for dinner.
Its because he was always allowed to come and hang out and have dinner and sleepover etc.
He was comfortable here and knew that he was always welcome.
Our whole family was invited to his graduation party.
We got to get to know his parents pretty well and they were happy to know that he had a safe place to hang out.
I remember calling my son after basketball practice one night to tell him dinner was almost ready and he said he was with some friends, I said well bring them over too.
He showed up with 9 kids, I am totally serious. It was the whole group of kids he was friends with on the basketball team.
They felt bad and didn't all want to come in and eat, but I insisted and I just threw on some more spagetti and meatballs.
They had been having a snowball fight before they came in so I threw all their coats in the dryer for them.
It turned out to be a great night, we had alot of fun.
The next day at one of the basketball games all the moms of those boys came up and thanked me for taking care of them.
They laughed and said they thought I was nuts feeding all those big boys but it was fine with me.
My daughter is home from college for the weekend and she had two of her girlfriends over last night to visit and those girls have been coming here since they were 5 years old.
I remember hanging out with kids that were never allowed to have kids over, to the point that if you were out with them and they had to go in their house for something you had to wait on the steps for them.
I hung out with kids that I never got to see the inside of their houses.
I could never do that to my kids, I always tell them that this is their home and as long as they respect it they can have friends over whenever they like.
It has worked out well for us and them.
I still have younger children, the youngest is 5 years old and I am going to do the same as I did with the older kids.
I am not saying that it will solve all their problems and they every kid that comes here will never get in trouble, I can't predict the future but I do think that it has made a big difference so far.